Updates!

Yes, well I thought it about time to update everyone, and anyone interested in recent and interesting events.

Things, seemingly, have settled down.

Is this the power of positive thinking at its best? I am inclined to think so!!!

OK, I have, *cough* and drum roll, officially become an English teacher. How the Hell did that happen?! She asks bemused!

I mean I had to be THE most unlucky and hap-hazard teacher in ALL of Madrid. Everyone else had floods of students, and me, well I couldn’t catch a fish if, well, if I fell in the river and, however the saying goes!

 

Yet, with a little ‘networking’; hehe, get me, a little networking, well I never! Seems that International Politics degree did give me some skills to transfer into my life after all! I’m being cynical, it has worked wonders for me so far, honestly.

What makes the work situation better, is that I am calling the shots. This is the great thing about taking on private classes! Oh, but I may have an interview on Friday.  Just thought I’d throw that one in the mix too! It has taken long enough, so I am EXTREMELY happy!

NO jinxing me, please! Remember, what goes around WILL come around.

So, from all of this soon to be teaching, there is money in the bank? Well, not yet, but it will happen! Yipppeeee! So, I can tick one ‘to do’ off my list then? Hoping so!

The social groups are revealing THE most interesting people. ‘Like attracting like’ (rules of attraction); there I go again, blowing my own trumpet, dear me.

I have met so many people who have just been able to open the relevant doors for me. I actually feel, although reticent to say it allowed, blessed.

For once in a long while, I feel my direction is going in a direction! I feel like I am walking on rose petals and not poisoned thorns, a little dramatic I know, but so true.

There is fertile ground, land ahoy, the storm is over – OK, not over, just a temporary reprieve and I am sure it will resume soon enough. So, I err on the side of caution, BUT, maintain a positive outlook!

I have also managed to meet some pretty cool friends too. I have been a bit of a social butterfly recently, and am loving it! Why not, I am young and although not single, I am free (not cheap, merely free).

The volunteering is still going well, I am chief researcher; ta dah! I maybe a real ‘geek’ , but I LOVE research.

Oh, and I am writing for ANOTHER blog, as a guest writer! This is great, as there is a ready made ‘fan base’. I am so unused to lots of people merely just liking my writing without prompt, I could get used to it!!!!

Finally, but not nor ever will it be THE end of it; my Spanish practice. Mas or menos igual; in other words, it is more or less equal to what it was. Though, I am feeling more confident.

Today I have had to speak to people in Spanish via the telephone. What the Hell has happened to me????!!!! Actually speaking on the telephone in a language I have been quite afraid of using!!! Telephone conversations were posing an obstacle for me on the confidence stakes. Yet, I managed it, although, not in a hurry to repeat it.

Oh, but I have found THE best ‘intercambio’ partner though. She is a Spanish teacher, and so nice. I do feel my confidence to increase my communication is on the rise, yes actual conversation, woo hoo! Watch this space people, anything is possible!

 

 

 

 

 

Not So Social, Social Groups

After the incident at the Skeptics Group, I found myself re-evaluating what the Hell these meet-up social groups are really about, and who are they for?

They cater for an idea of what constitutes a social gathering, that is true, but its not really my idea of what that should be.

I have, I think, been kidding myself by seeing these meet-up groups as the best way of locating new friends. These groups are sold as meetings to find friendship, so, it is this marketing that has deluded me.

I now see that this meet-up group set up, is akin to picking up a man/woman in a bar, and then expecting to get married and live happily ever after with them! These meet-up groups offer no real, connected or longevity relationship; nothing substantial can come from this setting. It is empty, self serving, shallow and based on no form of real identity or trust.

I am not looking for a sexual partner, don’t get my words twisted, I am looking for a friend or friends. These are what such meet-up groups are supposed to be about; friendship connections, fun and interesting people, yet, they aren’t. Why aren’t they?!

It is a BIG FAT CON!

So far there have been empty promises, cancelations, being used for english language practice, men and women trying their luck, bitchiness, arrogance, self importance and ‘intellectualism’ (but really it has been delusions of grandeur)!

Put people together in such phoney settings and see the worst surface in them.

Are there genuine, and decent people existing in cities such as Madrid? Or, are they all too wrapped up in themselves, and their lives to allow potential decent folk into their little bubbles? Are they afraid of change, of something new, of a challenge?

I never felt it was hard to make friends before, OK, not all of those I have been friends with remain my friends, but at least I had friends! Here, in Madrid, it seems an up-hill struggle.

I feel as though I am having to make all the effort to connect, and it peeves me! I think I have eventually met a potential friend, and then it begins, the same old; ‘I can’t do that’, ‘have to cancel that’, ‘sorry but,’, blah, blah, blah!

Perhaps it is me? Perhaps I come across as weird or something? Perhaps being talkative, listening, being friendly and polite is weird? Perhaps I should try being rude, aloof and obnoxious? Perhaps next time someone says, let’s arrange to go for coffee, I should reply, if you want a coffee with me then you get in touch with me first and then we shall see.

I wonder if they would get in touch, but I won’t wonder for long! The answer is going to be that 99.9% of people won’t bother to get in touch!

This makes me doubly peeved; if I was looking for no strings sex here in Madrid, I’d have no issue, sex is everywhere. Yet, finding decent friendships is like asking for the sun and the moon on a gold platter! I really don’t get it; empty and meaningless sexual encounters holds more place in people’s lives than decent, fulfilling, longevity and substantial friendships!

Friendships are important, they can encourage, improve and stabilise mental, and spiritual well-being.

It is really quite sad when you think about what this ‘sex culture’ has to say about people, and their priorities.

Confident? Who Can Tell?

I don’t want to dig at anyone else. I don’t want to say; ‘hey you are wrong’! Yet, I have to state, just for my won record, that I don’t necessarily agree on any one definition of confidence, or in fact how to spot confidence.

Until I know a person I refrain from making a sweeping judgement on them and their life history. Perhaps, because I spent my life being judged by others!!! I also don’t agree that by being confident it can make you a beautiful person, because confidence alone doesn’t make a person anything.

I also question whether any one person is 100% confident? I doubt they are, and doubt they are confident 100% of the time. Also, how often is confidence mistook for being arrogant, cocky, foolish, dismissive, spiteful, brash and so on and so on?

I too used to think, because I was actually told by people who said they were under confident; the reasons these people always bragged about themselves and their life, bullied others, acted up or had to be the comedian, talked too much and too loudly, was because they felt under confident. Perhaps this is true for some people, but not for everyone.

Now, I have never been 100% confident in me – NEVER! Yet, I am good at masking this, moving on, challenging myself and pushing myself to ensure I don’t hide away. I can appear confident no doubt, but not by bragging, talking too loudly or rambling on and on about me in conversation. Just by how I interact, what I am willing to do, even good eye contact and positive body language.

In fact, I learnt to not brag myself up or what I had or did from a young age. Bragging was believed to be crass, and discussing your personal life and wealth was too. Also hogging the conversation, talking too loudly about nonsense or personal matters, and acting like a complete fool to gain attention – all were deemed crass and a BIG no, no!

I was brought up to be modest, not to ‘blow my own horn’, to listen and then speak, to be mannerly and adhere to social etiquettes. In short, I was taught to not act as though I were too important, not to place myself above other people. Whether I was richer, more intelligent, more talented, artistic, or whatever; I had to just keep quiet about it all, and allow others to impart to me their life stories.

Being forced to be modest all of the time, and this sort of ‘social conditioning’, along with other issues, has actually contributed over the years to my own battle with under confidence. Another reason, one of THE most profound reasons for feeling bad about me in general, stems from being severely bullied from a young age up until I left school. This was actually because of who I was, and what others perceived of me. I know because some of these bullies actually admitted this to me at one point. They bullied me because they saw me as threat. I wouldn’t be like them, I didn’t want to be their friends, I refused to bow to what they wanted or act as though I wasn’t an individual with my own brain.

Yet, some people think that ALL bullies have confidence issues, well, my bullies may have had those issues, yet I do too and have NEVER bullied another.

So is it wrong to display a ‘false confidence’? Is it wrong to brag about you, to talk loudly, to perhaps not listen intently, to be the comedian (or whatever else)? Well consider this, how can anyone get anywhere unless they are willing to at least brag a little about themselves and their qualities? How do we become an employee, a student, a boss, an entrepreneur, how do we get a bank loan or find a partner? We display ourselves in the best possible light, and we talk about what we can offer, and often languish in a little self importance.

People may be or not be confident, BUT people being people WILL display this under confidence in many varying ways. There isn’t one type of anything. Confidence, like the weather, changes depending on what, who, where and how.

In my opinion any-way!!!

Related articles: from lifeonwry.com at WordPress
Can You Spot A Truly Confident Person?

The Publishing Ladder

This post comes as part of a response I made to ‘And the Winner Is…Self-Publishing’ a post by Jessica Vealitzek (http://jessicavealitzek.com/), which was regarding the route to publishing written work.

My comment:

‘I think not enough personal journeys in this area are documented (regarding people’s experiences with trying to publish work); so many people just need good and honest advice on this (the route to publishing) to save wasted time and frustration! Oh, I have a question; do you know whether there is a ‘collective’ of writers who are looking to be published? What I mean is, other people in similar situations who want to get published, and who can pull together pooling their resources; knowledge, contacts and abilities, which could aid a publishing objective?? Does that make sense or am I rambling?? It would be like a group of people working together for a common purpose; making a website to put the work on, to do the advertising and networking to get interest for ALL of their work?? I don’t know, might be a crazy or illogical idea, but more minds might be better than one to unravel the publishing conundrum; on-line or via a traditional route! More voices shouting out louder surely have to be heard! I don’t know! Just a thought I came up with!’

I then posted another response to Jessica stating I would do some research into the above, to check if such ‘support’ was out there for writers. To be honest I wondered whether my take of a ‘collective’ of writers wasn’t just ‘independent publishers’, and the beginnings of what we recognise as traditional publishing houses.

Anyhow, I have managed to complete some research, and found some links regarding ‘collectives’ or ‘cooperatives’. I have also looked at what advice is out there for people who are trying to get published, and the ‘pros and cons’ of the online publishing route too.

AUTHOR COOPERATIVES:

1: http://authorselectric.blogspot.co.uk/

2: http://awesomeindies.wordpress.com/
There are hurdles in place for wannabe writers on this site; jump over these and then they may consider reviewing your work.

3: http://www.wordswithjam.co.uk
Submissions for short stories with a word limited of 2500, but they also look for new article writers for their blog.

4: http://www.bookviewcafe.com
Members only publishing cooperative.

5: Yahoo groups: for example there are Indie Authors Forum and Indie Romance Authors – these offer tips/tricks for one another’s work.

6: http://www.rockitreads.com/
All genre Romance; for work that is self published and on-line already.

7: http://thirsteditions.com
Closed to submissions, no unsolicited manuscripts; ummmm, this sounds familiar!

8: http://www.leagueofextraordinaryauthors.com/

9: http://allianceindependentauthors.org/about.html
Seems to be most inclusive site; they encourage new authors, give advice and will review their work. Yippee!!

The author cooperatives I have read about, and discovered through my research are not really an open forum for the everyday writer struggling out there. They are closed shops; where you would have had to have been a member from the beginning, been in on the formation of the cooperative. In other words, author cooperatives do seem to me to be a branch of independent publishing. They will only promote their own work, and are not really willing to share their knowledge or give advice and tips to other writers.

I must admit I am more frustrated by discovering this, and disheartened somewhat. I am aware there are an abundance of people writing, and possibly too many to ensure that they all get published. I am aware that masses of time and resources have to go into the; proof reading, editing, providing advice and tips and even promotion of work, and passing on author’s work to possible publishers. Yet, surely there could be some services dedicated to this, and this alone; to enable more new author’s to actually get published in one format or another!!

So if there are no open cooperatives that authors can join, then where is the progress?

What are the options out there for help, support and advice for wannabe authors?
The answer, well, there doesn’t seem to be much of any of that available.

Why is it so difficult for ordinary people to get on the ladder of being published and then achieve their goal?

The Ladder of Success

Perhaps it is because writing is comparable to the art world. Experts deem one type of art is the only one correct, and therefore the only one worthy of the title of art, of accolades and praise. Yet, isn’t there beauty in all art? Writing is the same as art; freedom of expression, individuality and passion. Whose job is it to say what is valid? Who has the sole authority to sanction what is good enough, and then dismiss every other writer, novel or a piece of work? These experts only know the genres or work they are familiar with; it is only their individual opinion after all! That doesn’t mean what is being written outside of these opinions, labels and boxes is wrong or not a valuable piece of work. There is surely volumes of written jems going unnoticed, all because of stringent rules and guidelines and people’s opinions; oh, not to mention the fact that there are not enough people willing to read new writers work or offer any help.

People always say that you can only write from your heart, about what you know, to please yourself; but still these publishing hurdles stating what work is acceptable are placed in the path of potential writers. You have to face word limitations, genre limitations, plot limitations, structure limitations and so on and so on. How is this art? How is this expression?

I am no literary critic, my degree is in Politics not English Literature, I am no expert on how to write a novel; so does that naturally mean any work I produce won’t be valid? I have no one to direct me, no place to go for advice and I don’t have any relevant networks in the publishing world to call a favour from; so that means I haven’t a cat in Hell’s chance of getting anything published?

Maybe I need to begin my own author’s cooperative!!

Having somewhere people can get information from; clear and simple advice which is free and honest, hints and tips to move themselves, and their work on and into the publishing world is essential!!!!!

Yet, it doesn’t seem to exist! What I have been reading about the publishing world and even the ‘cooperative’ world is confusing and conflicting. There are opinions, and lots of them, from people who already have the deal sown up. Yet, these people aren’t willing to share, to help others even try to get on that ladder that they have already climbed!!!! WHY???

THOUGHT OF PUBLISHING ON-LINE?

There are so many hurdles and gatekeepers to the knowledge, and advice you require to move on with your quest to publish. How can you over come no support or advice? What do you do to get noticed, to get popular and published?

Well, many see self publishing a route to change the goal posts set by traditional publishing houses. Online is an option to open the fair playing field and create the equitable, even for the most ordinary of author’s running around about their daily business, and 9-5 work routines!

In fact a growing number of authors have decided to become editor, designer, marketer and sales director for their own ebooks. In return for this hard slog, instead of a modest advance, plus the 8%–15% royalty from a traditional publisher, a self-published author may enjoy royalties of 70% that is if their book is sold at a certain price (£1.49 to £7.81) on Kindle.

Self-published authors can also see their ebooks in high-street shops too. Apparently Waterstones recently made a deal with rival Amazon to sell Kindles and ebooks through its 300 stores.

Yet, it is still the case that the MOST successful self-published ebooks spring from POPULAR and ENTRENCHED genres with large online communities such as; fantasy, erotica, chick-lit, horror and crime thrillers.

To be noticed you need to stand out online. Keywords rule the day; tags and search engine optimisation has never been more important. Distinctive is good, but baffling is not.

If online is the way to break the publishing mould then every author SHOULD create a website (well, that is what the experts advise). An online presence being essential for a new author, because when people buy your book they want to find out more about you. A website is seen as the essential sales and marketing platform. This might be part a parcel of the serious self-publisher.

Another element to be being serious and professional when it comes to self publishing is recruiting the help of external editors, proofreaders and especially cover designers. Is this what ‘self publishing’ means? Well, if you want to make on average 34% more from your ebook sales, yes, you’ll recruit! So merely writing, and completing your book isn’t the end of the fight; production and marketing are still waiting for the next bout to begin.

You see readers care about formatting and proofreading. Sloppy work will get mentioned in any reviews and it will hurt your sales. Although help need not be expensive, why not get potential readers to proof read your work?!

Still, do you know who to go to for help with your website, proof reading, editing and graphic artwork input for that cover?? Seems like its more calling on who you know, or researching and hoping there will be help out there for a nominal fee.

ISN’T THIS ON-LINE PUBLISHING SUPPOSED TO BE EASY?!

After all of this work, how then do you get interest in you and your work from on-line communities? How about sending a review request document to bloggers who have written reviews about books in your genre??? Choose THE most relevant bloggers. Treat it like a sales pitch, and a personalised request is the most persuasive; so is one including details about your book and links to any previous reviews, Twitter feeds and websites to encourage the bloggers interest. Offers of interviews or guest blogs may also work in your favour to provide marketing for your work.

Are you wondering how to find the right audience online though? Well, there are ways and means to get anything, for a price. Marketing software called Tweet Adder enables you to make contact with people who follow other authors in the same genre as you.

Yet, isn’t promoting yourself or your product via Twitter merely spam? There is a fine line yes, and the information on the etiquette of this is conflicting (what a surprise)! Some experts say it is appropriate to promote your work 5 times a day, but others say once an hour. So, depending on your view this marketing technique alone could become a full time job!

It is up to you how far to take the online networking though, as a recent Verso survey estimated that barely 12% of books are discovered from social networks. 50% are still discovered from the old fashioned word of mouth, or personal recommendations.

OK, then what about freebies?? How about giving your ebook away FREE online for a limited time only?? Crazy, yeah? No, as this trick could boost sales once you sell it at its intended price.

SO, THE FUTURE IS BRIGHT, THE FUTURE IS ON-LINE?

The future seems to be one where authors will prove their merit in the self-published world of the internet, before they are snapped up by mainstream publishers. Maybe for some, yet not all self publishers are making it ‘big time’ I.E earning more than say a person could in a ‘normal’ 9-5.

A survey of 1,007 self-published writers, by the way it is one of the most comprehensive insights into the growing market to date; found that while a small percentage of authors were bringing in sums of $100,000 plus, average earnings were just $10,000 a year in 2011. In fact LESS than 10% of the survey earned LESS than $500.

Apparently, if it is the big money you want then you SHOULD focus on self publishing Romantic fiction. Romance authors earned 170% more than their peers, while authors in other genres fared much worse; science-fiction writers earned 38% of the $10,000 average, fantasy writers 32%, and literary fiction authors just 20% of the $10,000 average.

More statistics of success for you; if you are female, educated and in your early 40s great news, ebook success could be yours! Top earners who could live off their earnings were 68% female and 33% of these had a degree. High earners also dedicated more of their time to their writing, churning out 2,047 words a day. Money makes money, perhaps!

ANSWERS PLEASE!!!!!!

Sorry, no REAL answers, and no REAL comprehensive advice or support. It is all a bit vague, and confusing. Negotiating the myriad of the ‘shoulds’ and ‘musts’ of the publishing world are difficult. Whether on-line or via the traditional publishing houses, the obstacles seemed not to have really changed; different settings, yes, but the hoops and hurdles remain the same!

The language of publishing is shrouded in secrecy; how, when, what, who, blah and blah, it is just not quantified enough. It’s an unknown and closed circle of information, there are no guarantees, and little communication; really no one wants to help. I would like to see the doors to being published opened to the normal people, give them a chance too!!! I wish I could make my own cooperative, where advice and proof reading options could be available, but I don’t have the expertise! I am infuriated by the lack of clarification, support and publishing opportunities available to new writers; I wish I could change it!! The doors shut outweigh the doors open, and it’s about time this changed.

What I mean is; if you wanted to be a Doctor or Teacher or another type of professional, would the career path and way to achieve your goal be so uncertain? Would the doors be closed and the chances of success so slim? Would it be shrouded in mystery, confusing, surrounded in baffling opinions and information? Would it be the case that plenty has been documented about the career, but not enough, not the exact of how to actually achieve it!

No, I don’t think so.

There would be the help and support required; there would be information available which is clear and concise. The routes of how to begin that career would be set out for all to see.

Wanting to be a writer is akin to wanting to walk on the Moon; it’s a great pipe-dream, but what is the likelihood of that ever happening? Ummm, about a billion to one I think!

Understand what I mean?

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© Bex Houghagen and The Savvy Senorita, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Bex Houghagen and The Savvy Senorita with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.