The Fabulous Dream Weaver – turning dreams into a reality at a town near you

In the post that follows I will be focusing upon my favourite species of writer; the POSITIVE THINKERS or AKA the Preachers of the new religion. I will be featuring the genre of writing these Preachers like to churn out in abundance; with little prior thought attached.

Yet, there will be those amongst you who no doubt categorise POSITIVE THINKING posts as being logical, soul-saving, invigorating, inspiring and enlightening. I am however doubtful (as ever), that the positive words contained in such writing could truly provide guidance to anyone. They may claim to give us inspiration and hope to right our miserable lives and achieve wonders, but I wonder whether such writing only creates a population of unhappy and discontented people.

I believe that POSITIVE THINKERS, and their positive writing styles encourage others to feel as though they have somehow missed out on something wonderful, and are in short, failures. From this people react; becoming self-obsessed, frustrated and materialistic in their search for life’s deserved glory to be dispensed upon them somehow. Yet, all of this surface sheen and slippery slope to pretension is deemed to be a higher state of being by the POSITIVE THINKING BRIGADE; sad but true.

“It takes more than a few ideas, hopes and little to no effort to go from a just a dream to reality. It’s important to clearly state and write down your dreams or goals this is a vital step. Then create a plan and hold your self accountable for deadlines you have given yourself”.

“Our thoughts become reality”.  Simply said, our mind naturally manifests things into existence if we truly believe in them.  Visualization is one of the best ways to make your dreams come to fruition”.

Above is so typical of the positive thinking prose. It PREACHES a new world religious order dedicated to the church of positive thinking. IS THIS proposition LOGICAL though? Should we also engage in casting some spells, and perform mystical rituals while we dance around an Oak tree naked? Just believe Brothers and Sisters and all will be well with the world; just close your eyes and wish yourself a better life. Is there a pair of ruby slippers on hand too by chance?

There is apparently NO EXCUSE either (other than the laws of logic and the premise of something called – reality) to achieving this magical wonder of new and fantastical existence:

“So for those who sit around making excuses about how they can’t reach their dream or goal. I want you to ask yourself a question is your excuse really worth going through a life time of regret wishing you would have followed your dream?”

Here we go again, brow beating and admonishing in a preaching and condescending tone; linked apparently to this person’s improved wisdom and backbone. This person has achieved the wonderful life, so let us all kneel in awe.

I have to state, as I have done so before; I DON’T AGREE with regrets (stone me to death now). We do what we do because we feel it is the right thing at that time; all of which amounts to worthwhile life experiences. Life IS NOT necessarily just about COUNTABLE ACHIEVEMENTS WHICH SEEMS TO BE SYNONYMOUS WITH MATERIAL GAINS. How is this helping anyone other than trying to give the reader an inferiority complex or hunger for avarice?

Also, if there are NO EXCUSES, where are yours Mr or Miss Writer? You haven’t enlightened us humble nobodies as to how such things are quantifiable or achievable. My advice; what about producing a how-to-guide on this one; might make you some money for the old yarn you are spinning.

Can I ask, as no one else seems to; what is the big secret to all of this creation of a wonderful life by mere thought alone – if it is so possible? Questioning the truth and honesty of these fantastical claims are NEVER answered, merely ignored.

The apparent processes to results are thus……………

“Focusing on the process allows you to view setbacks or failures as opportune to learn and improve.  It may sound cliché (add in by me: yes it does) but it is true failure can become our biggest teachers. I remember when I first started writing there were countless number of people would say I could never be a writer and my dreams were silly and my writing style was filled with misspellings, grammar mistake’s  and grammatical errors (add in by me: has this changed?) Those negative comments just fueled (add in by me: what is this?) my work ethic and made me work harder than I ever did before to improve my skills and to prove them wrong”

Mr or Miss Writer your skills include turning over the same well-trodden ground as a hundred other people before and after you. It is boring and mundane spiel that is merely deemed to be safe and happy; all in the aid of wracking up those ‘likes’.

How do you really feel and what do you really do – those are things I’d like to know. Are you on cloud nine every second of every day? Perpetual positivity and happiness is just not the normal human condition; we all fail and flounder sometimes, and become angry, deflated, upset and frustrated!

I also wonder why is it that those who question this positive writing and associated ideas, are subjected to the seventh circle of Hell from those who lap this type of material up as gospel. They can speak their minds, but Heaven forbid I speak mine and don’t blindly concur with them.   

“Do you fantasize about how your life would be if you make your dreams a reality? (Add in by me: no I fantasize about how wonderful life truly would be minus rubbish like this). Often people avoid following a specific dream because it will takes years to achieve what they want. I want to encourage anybody reading this follow their dreams and passions (add in by me: bravo – give that person a medal or The Nobel Peace Prize).  Whatever your vision, there’s no time like the present to put your big ideas into action (add in by me: throw caution to the wind – sod the bills and whatever else just go for it). Comment below what your dream is & if you like this please share!”

Yes, please do share this – with the bin. Have these POSITIVE PREACHERS NEVER EXPERIENCED A HICCUP IN THEIR PERSONAL LIVES – EVER?! There is NO HINT as to what or how this person achieved whatever it is they achieved; if they even achieved it. The insult to injury is the fact this person actually encourages that this motivational idiosyncrasy is spread like a destructive wildfire just so they can then hear; “Wow, you and your words are fabulous”, “So inspirational”.

Why is it fabulous? What has this person revealed or stated that is so fabulous, so mind-blowing, so inspirational and so unique? People like it because everyone else likes it; popular merely creates popular just like the story of the Emperor’s New Clothes. Everyone then JUMPS ON THE BANDWAGON hoping to get a piece of the pie.

The ordinary and reality facing us all in life is once again frowned upon, and displayed as unworthy and somehow just not good enough. Or, worse still not taken seriously and dismissed, because one thought alone can dispel such hardships; ill-health, homelessness, murder and so on will then go away forever. Didn’t you know EVERYONE should be (through some innate entitlement) become the Astronaut, Pilot, Actor, Lawyer, Writer, Artist – everyone deserves fame and accolades, and EVERYONE WILL achieve them. Will they though?

We are setting the world up for huge failure here. No wonder Psychologists have huge waiting lists, and everyone is so disappointed that they have to work and live in the real world! It is very like those Quack Doctors who used to sell life purifying cure all’s at the 19th century carnival side shows. They were likeable fellows I am sure, and a colourful charade which was purely meant to titillate their audiences, but NO ONE TOOK THEM SERIOUSLY (well, at least not now in the 21st century)!

Put the word POSITIVE before something, and suddenly it becomes gospel, the new word from God. It makes me laugh though, as these people probably would be reviled at the thought of God and shun the idea of Heaven or Hell, and yet haven’t they read their own (if it is their own) words? It reminds me of religious dogma and those that peddle this thinking positive craze are actually zealots. They refuse to see any other way of life or thinking, and certainly won’t accept any another view point; as we all have to convert to their faith.

Finally I did leave one of my own thoughts (as below) for this person; meant in jest and yes I was being sarcastic. The sentiment was wasted though as they didn’t realise this; so full of their own self-importance:

“It never ceases to amaze me how thinking positively and visualising your dreams alone can be responsible for changing so many people’s lives; wow. It must be some sort of miracle, and I think there should definitely be a way to bottle this, and market it to the general populace. Lives would change in moments! Thanks for posting this – utter revelation and I for one am a convert”.

The person in question actually had the audacity to like my comment, and so too did three of their readership or worshippers. I shall say no more except; is it the blind leading the blind or what?

The Reveal

I recently published two posts; one was entitled A Test and the other A Test (Part 2). The first post was meant as satire – sorry folks, but it was a test! I assumed that the material contained in this first post, based around a positive thinking angle would receive more ‘likes’ over a shorter duration, and it did. The latter post was meant as a real life view of the world, and consequently it received lesser ‘likes’ over a longer duration.

I therefore can only assume this disparity of ‘likes’ has been due to the fact my second post didn’t regurgitate the usual positive thinking people tend to prefer. It actually questioned the motives and logic of such thinking. In it I refused to pander to the “peaches and cream brigade”, and didn’t falsely claim that such positive attitudes could, and would remedy all the bad people face in their lives (because this is an implausible claim to make). Perhaps therefore this disbelief of a life miracle instigated automatic dislike amongst people; as they prefer not to truly confront their own realities.

On a different note I do wish to mention my real deal, genuine and most active readers, which includes those who are always gracious enough to leave me a comment or ‘like’ one of my posts. These readers also contributed to the ‘likes’ generated across both of these posts. I thank them for their ‘likes’, and wanted to take time to state how much I value them as readers. I also wanted to state how much I value those readers here on WordPress with OPEN MINDS (becoming rarer all the time), and again thank them for their support too. They make writing on WordPress worthwhile as they can see both sides of the coin, and still smile.

A Test (part 2)

I wouldn’t try to convince anyone the world is an ugly  place – it isn’t the world merely most of the people in it. Either way it’s not for me to convince anyone of either of those things. I would however like it if more often those people selling ‘think positively’, ‘self-help’, ‘self-development’ and ‘life is marvellous’ would be told to stop trying to convince, and brow beat us all into their world view. Alas it seems we prefer a rose tinted life view rather than reality.

I will be honest; often I require a sick bucket whenever I read that type of rose tinted twaddle, as it is so far from the mark for most people.

What I believe, and think about life is merely the alternative side. It is what people do forget about; the real life story. I am neither a positive nor a negative person; I am just being real and I am not succumbing to a notion of selling a fantasy cure all. I do dislike people who perpetually sell life as a bowl of peaches and cream (in that I won’t lie); the reality is that FOR MOST PEOPLE LIFE ISN’T AND WON’T BE PEACHES AND CREAM. Recognising that and representing a real world alternative actually is a balanced and helpful method.

Why must we all always pretend EVERYTHING is marvellous, and disparage those who state otherwise? 

As there will be people, more than less, who wish to see that their life and their feelings about it aren’t as amiss or as fundamentally wrong as most of the ‘positive’ and ‘all is wonderful’ camps state that it is. I feel I can state that life does suck – if not always, mostly; reassuring people out there that they are not alone in thinking this thought.

The fact people remain hopeful, and also keep moving on regardless of the bad is a great thing. I certainly wouldn’t wish for it to be any other way, as I wouldn’t want to see anyone flounder. I ONLY WISH THE BEST FOR EVERYONE; if only that was true of everyone else I have encountered in my life.

Yet does wishing the best also include selling a lie? 

My motivations for stating my views regarding life being quite rubbish for most people is not based upon a sour, miserable or jealous outlook either. I AM NOT NOR EVER HAVE BEEN A JEALOUS PERSON, that is not who I am and that is not my reasoning for thinking or believing what I do. I merely want to convey and establish the state of reality experienced in most people’s lives, and the limitations they face and can’t often change.

Knowing life isn’t peaches and cream doesn’t make me revel in amusement, but I have come to find myself ambivalent. I do admit that perhaps my high expectations for myself, and for others to be kind, genuine and respectful has no doubt affected my view. Perhaps I have expected too much from people, and from life in general. Yet, others have high expectations of achieving material gains, commercial and fame based successes and so on and so on; which for me are high enough to be more often than not unreal and unobtainable. Nevertheless these things are also reinforced as obtainable, normal and desirable by positive thinkers.

So I suppose with this carpe diem philosophy it has become normal for such small gains like genuine kindness to be overlooked in life, because we all want a perfect life and an image of positive greatness. LIFE IS MARVELLOUS after all, BUT WHAT MAKES IT SO? How we treat one another or what we achieve via positive thinking?

By stating all of this doesn’t signify that I underestimate myself or my life either; I have lots to be proud and thankful for, but I now have more realistic expectations of the world about me. What job I have, how new my new car is or how far I’ve travelled – doesn’t matter to me and in truth never did. What has mattered is realising life is flat, dull and fruitless. The other things are just distractions from the realisation.

Those silly things that often cloud people’s perceptions such as; material wealth, healthy living in the gym, obtaining immortal beauty, adhering to the rules of attraction, travelling like a nomad and securing high-flying jobs don’t cloud my realisation. All of these things are equally as worthless; merely an enforced life checklist of procedures to get through (because the time is ticking and you might die tomorrow).

What I do believe is that YOUR LIFE SHOULD BE YOUR LIFE, and you should do with it what you will – not what others churn out you should do; in vast vapid quantities listed as good advice, positive thinking, self-help and self-development.

If you are going to take advice from anyone, THEN TAKE IT FROM YOURSELF NOT OTHERS; who haven’t a clue about you, your life or your limitations. No one can tell you that by thinking positively or being optimistic and buying into ‘life is marvellous’ things will change substantially within your life. Regardless of how much you may plan or hope for the best or even try to change things; often things can and will go belly up! I am sorry, but it is true.

See life as being as empty as those ‘think positively’ promises and things may be better. 

I suppose what I am trying to state is that I can’t jump on the ‘life is marvellous’ bandwagon without admitting the real and severe flaws of it first! Even though many people can and do just to raise their ratings, because they actually don’t give a damn about the consequences of their twaddle.

P.S: This is a sort of response to a conversation – via comments – between myself and Green Embers. Just so he knows I am happy to credit him for the inspiration, and to tell him I do believe him to be a very good sort of person 🙂

A Game of Dodge Ball

Following on from my very old post; What is Hope? which I recently re-blogged, below is a new analysis of why I hate hope (what a change of opinion, and in only 3 years).

I may seem cynical. I can actually recall sitting in a Sociology class at college and my tutor calling me cynical, because I disagreed with him over Joseph Rowntree’s findings on poverty. I also remember my retort to him; “I’m not cynical, merely truthful and stating reality”. So, I wonder what changed within me; why did my opinions shift so radically from stating reality to becoming optimistically hopeful?

Hopeful is not a word I would use to describe myself now. Why? I actually despise hope.

Hope is a false friend. It is a cruel lie and a myth. Pandora should have been shoved head first in her antiquated box for her part to play its very existence. Why? Well because we cannot see hope, we cannot touch it, we cannot reasonably explain why it is; hope merely is or is not. This is not helpful or useful.

If you have hope you sail along foolishly thinking all will be well with the world. If you don’t have hope you realise life is a game of dodge ball (putting it politely). The best you can do with the latter scenario is laugh (possibly just as you might if you had hope); as who could imagine any other way of dealing with things that seem so grotesquely out of kilter?

“I just hope things will get better”; I am sicking of hearing this phrase! No, they won’t. You can’t just hope bad things away. Hope is another aliment just like being positive, and it wrecks havoc on your life (your real life), and you will never face the fact things are poop. SO, WAKE UP PEOPLE!

Hope is the thing that keeps you dangling in some strange in-between place that you can never really find. It is as frustrating and maddening as it would be searching for the end of a rainbow.

Without hope you probably do die in some metaphorical way, but with hope you will die anyway, but without realising you have been conned by the very thing you clung onto for comfort and truth.

Hope makes you believe in more, but it alone cannot get you what you want. Hope is not some miracle cure all, there is only you, and you alone may not be enough to get enough to make your life what you want.

“Abandon all hope ye that enter here”; yes please do as hope is not going to protect you from any storm, illness, death or mishap. I suggest arming yourself with something more powerful and potent to help you with that.

Sorry for being the cynic and distrusting the motives of hope, but to be blunt hope sucks!

 

 

 

A Thought on Positive Thinking

For the love of sanity; can everyone PLEASE let up on the mantra “the world is wonderful”, because I am left wondering who it is you are all trying to convince by saying this. Let me enlighten you; the world might be wonderful for some people, but for a vast majority who live in the REAL WORLD it isn’t all roses and miracles – nor will it be.

I have come to think that the people who perpetually peddle this “positive attitude”, and push all of the self help nonsense are the same people who’ve had very little negative things happen to them during their short lives.

Of course there are many people out there who would love to be sailing away on their mega yacht to the Caribbean (although not me as I am not fond of yachts, sailing or the Caribbean), I have to tell them that this WON’T happen. WHY? Well this cannot be everyone’s life course, because we live in a state of reality and not FANTASY.

99 times out of a 100 people’s lives consist of sucking up the ordinary and mundane whether that be; homelessness, inability to pay their way, horrible jobs, bad wages, no family or friends, death of loved ones, divorce, terrible family lives or whatever else! This is because some people need REAL and constructive help and support, not merely positive thinking alone to change their circumstances.

I know in this world of FANTASY such words are cold and harsh, but they are at least reality; which by the way it seems NO ONE wants to face up to. Of course there is also that other annoying word to deal with too; responsibility. Most people don’t want to just get up and walk away from everything in their life either, or perhaps they just can’t.

An example of those who can and do walk away; a Life Coach once told me he had become a Life Coach merely because he decided one day to this and drop everything else in his life; which also included his Wife and kids. He believed running off to “find himself” was far more admirable than dealing with his reality; his family. What a great positive life message for anyone to emulate; if you happen to be a cold, callous psychopath that is. This Life Coach then wondered why his kids no longer wanted anything to do with him. Erm, I wonder why too.

What truly peeves me though is the PRESSURE applied to people by this positive thinking and self help belief systems. It is the case that people are being told to be things that others deem necessary, and that if they don’t concede then their life cannot be classified as successful or happy. That in itself is a course to unhappiness. The best advice I’ve ever received is JUST BE YOU and BE HAPPY about that.

I wish people could just admit, without guilt, the fact that perhaps they don’t want to do anything with their lives! Why can’t people accept the fact they prefer watching another episode of their favourite TV show, lazing about and eating take away food while drinking too much wine! When people can do this, THEY CAN BE HAPPY or best of all CONTENT.

In this fantasy world we certainly DON’T like to endorse contentment; we weren’t all born to have bigger breasts, younger faces, bigger pecs, porn star sex lives, plenty of money, good jobs and so on and so on and so on, blah, blah, blah.

“We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War’s a spiritual war… our Great Depression is our lives. We’ve all been raised on television to believe that one day we’d all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won’t. And we’re slowly learning that fact. And we’re very, very p****d off” (Tyler Durden – Fight Club).

In my opinion the positive thinking and self help industry has modelled itself on the cosmetics industry; honing in on everyone’s low self esteem and lack of confidence. They all ONLY WANT YOUR MONEY and in return will ONLY SELL YOU FALSE PROMISES; “if you buy into this new scam everything in your life will become wonderful over night”. Erm, no it won’t!!!! You will still be you and your life will still be what it is.

The key to the positive thinking and self help success is that no one EVER really tells you HOW to achieve anything truly concrete. Yes, it is a secret because YES there are NO REAL answers.

Do you still want that profound over night life changing experience? YES PLEASE! Well, in that case here is my advice for you;

1. Be ruthless, selfish and determined to the point that no one else and nothing else matters.
2. Learn to say “sod it” and just do it anyway.
3. Leading on from this is the necessity to take risks without fearing the consequence of your actions.
4. Plus, it will certainly help if you have the funds to do everything you ever wanted to do, as either way you will have to keep paying your bills (reality sucks I know – but so too does having a Court Judgement and criminal record for debt related charges).

So, are we all feeling positive yet – or are we beginning to feel reality?

If you need more inspiration then please read the below articles for further insights on how to feel, the reality in life……….

dailymail.co.uk/…/Positive-thinking-makes-sick-JENNI-MURRAY-hates-self-help-industry

positivesharing.com/…/5-ways-positive-thinking-makes-us-miserable-at-work

 

 

The Stupid Fool

I was so annoyed yesterday with that stupid fool. I suppose that is my fault though, for letting her get to me. Yet, she is such a little *expletive* though.

My main problem stems from the fact I really want to tell her to *expletive*off! That is why I feel so aggravated by the situation, because I can’t say what I truly want to and remain professional (whatever that means, as to me it means being two-faced, a liar and a butt kisser)!

I do know what motivates the stupid fool to be an utter idiot with me. She is such a picky mare and all because she is jealous. Why else would the stupid fool single me out with such zeal, other than the fact I make her look stupid, and she can’t condensed to me. So, she tries to portray an impression that she can merely to upset me or spite me. Yet, she is spiting herself.

The other one said that the stupid fool is supposed to be more intelligent than we are; no she isn’t. Just because the stupid fool is of a higher rank doesn’t make her automatically more intelligent. Her behaviour, actions, attitude and general posturing doesn’t exuded intelligence, just B.S! Yes, she does have (supposed to have) a knowledge base and skill set I haven’t, but I could learn it if I wanted to. There isn’t much I can’t learn or won’t learn as my experience dictates! My path is not hers though, and I don’t want to do her job. I would actually equate doing her job as a personal failure in my life!

Yet, it is this prevailing notion in that place which completely sums up the attitude, ethos and thinking of them all. It is; a place for everything and everything in its place. Or as I like to correct them; being kept down and condescended to as though we are all indentured serfs. These people have a serious case of deference and enjoy tugging their forelock; which by the way if you weren’t aware of it already, just isn’t my style.

That’s not how I was brought up; I speak up and challenge everything. I believe in fair play and fair treatment. I also think anyone can do anything, and money nor the career you have makes you a better person or akin to God.

The thing is I know I have a brain and that I am educated. No one could convince me of the reverse, and I certainly don’t need to prove a thing to anyone (let alone the stupid fool)! Yet, the people I am stuck with (not family, not friends), are nothing like me. I have nothing in common with them or their attitudes, but I have to pretend to have a commonality; but mostly I am completely disinterested in them.

I have gained what they haven’t; although I am proud of this, I don’t make a point of it or brag about it to create reaction or effect (that’s not me either). I have qualifications, experience, skills, expertise and knowledge. I have worked in different roles covering different sectors. I have been through the  mill personally and come out the other end having learned, grown and developed. I am capable and also talented. I have done, have been, have achieved, and still will do. I am cultured and well versed with places and people.

The stupid fool who thinks she is condescending to me, already knows all about me and my skill set (et al). She also knows that she has no ground available to her by which she could look down upon me; couple that with the fact she is about 4 foot tall, and therefore physically never could in any case! I don’t say too much about myself though (unlike them). I like my personal space, but when their bragging begins I do retort. Yet every time I say something their faces turn sour, which is their way of saying “We hate you”!

I know that jealously is a terrible thing, but it certainly demonstrates just how important I must be, and of course jealousy is the biggest compliment of all so I merely smile to myself. Such silly reactions certainly make them appear to be insignificant, especially as they are all the type of people who require someone to condescend to; just to make their insecure selves feel better.

Of course I do play a role there, but it is not the real me. I play this role just to get by, which proves the power lies have within the workplace. We all seemingly have to pretend and lie to fit in, and actually ensure we have a job; it just seems so empty and fake.

Employers perpetuate this too and are setting people up to fail. It is an odd culture whereby we encourage employees to be liars, sneaky, spiteful and back stabbers. People it seems just don’t want nice or a nice truth. They don’t want diversity and variety, they want what they think makes a good employee, not person, employee; a thing, an object. God help if you rebel, speak up, disagree or want more!

Employers want someone they can manipulate, bully, harass, intimidate, use and abuse. They want us to jump to their commands and have no input, no value, no respect in return. I question what  employers can gain from that, because people aren’t happy; people cannot deliver their best under those conditions.

If people were treated better, they’d be happier and more productive. If they had more freedom to be themselves and speak their mind, they’d be happier. If the power balance was more stable in work and people didn’t become depots in their roles, people would be happier. If it wasn’t one rule for one and one rule for another, people would be happier.

People would be happier, perhaps therein lies the issue; who wants anyone to actually be happy in work and life?! Heaven help! Perhaps if that stupid fool wasn’t so curtailed she wouldn’t act like such a, fool, and maybe as a knock on effect those she comes into contact with would feel happier too! What a revelation; treat others as you would like to be treated – who knew that was such a hard lesson to learn? Well, she is a stupid fool though, so what can I expect!

Whose Biological Clock?

It is a very normal and accepted state of affairs; the older man and the younger woman. These relationships are so common place they have become a cliche. Yet, when the reverse is considered; an older woman and a younger man people seem to be sickened by the very idea.

Why?

What is good for the goose is good for the gander, or so I’ve been told. So I ask myself; what makes us sit in judgement over a woman doing what she wants with whomever she wants to do it with (in a literal sense)?

Attraction, and even love aren’t always formulated from what we as individuals may perceive to be ideal. We all have different tastes and desires after all, because by our very nature or nurture, we are all different. Whether it be older men, younger women, older women and younger men, who really cares or more importantly why should we care? After all, it isn’t our business and it isn’t our life!

What I find I dislike most when I hear of or see other people’s reactions to an older women and younger man’s relationship, is that the older woman is so highly disapproved of. Almost as though once a woman is passed thirty it is game over!

Perhaps the reason for this is because once a woman passes thirty she is suddenly deemed unworthy of gaining love, affection and sex from anyone, especially a younger man? Could this be because she is considered to be well passed her prime functions of; marriage material, a baby making machine or sex goddess? If so I wonder whose biological clock (and just to let you know I hate this phrase), is actually ticking?

If we are all attracted to one another based on those three options we are making a rod for our own backs. 

I find this aversion to older women and younger men to be contradictory, and quite sad actually. I say this not just because I am a woman either. There are so many intelligent, talented, beautiful and successful women out there, passed thirty, forty or even fifty. They still have their whole life to live. Yet, society insists on forcing these independent, fierce and capable beings into small and restrictive boxes, dictating what they should and shouldn’t be doing.

Isn’t it about time these boxes were crushed under these women’s designer heels?

I for one believe that; no longer should the soft top sports car be the preferred babe hunting vehicle of men only, it isn’t desperate to want to pay for your man’s designer suit, it isn’t unladylike or shocking to appreciate a younger physique, especially one that sports a six pack.

Basically, for anyone still in doubt; it isn’t wrong or disgusting to find someone attractive who is younger or older than you are, and it isn’t wrong or disgusting to find their success, money or experience attractive too!

I say; let us live and let live!

Hey Jealousy!!

I have been thinking about jealousy, again, and the damaged people behind the emotion. Jealousy seems to be an unstoppable plague blighting humanity and no one can escape it!!!!

Opinions, we all have them…..

I forgot about this post, but thanks to robertmgoldstein.com reminding me of my words, I decided I’d re-publish………..

I speak, you speak, they speak, we all speak; but do we even care what is being said?

Opinions; seem to be integrated into us, derived from who we are and what we know. Yet, they are subject to change. Opinions differ from person to person, context, situation and time. They can be fleeting or concrete. Yet what influences them to change? Is it because we are malleable and easily swayed when we come under pressure from others?

Do we willingly abandon our opinions when challenged? Should we?

As bloggers we all have plenty to say. I know I can’t get enough of opinions; mine and other peoples! I thoroughly enjoy writing opinions and reading them; new ideas, experiences and knowledge hold a wealth of inspiration for me. I actively seek out new blogs just to read what has been posted; I think I am addicted to the written word! I know I WOULDN’T want anyone to tame their opinion or tailor their words to please me. Yet, some people might not feel the same. Some people might only appreciate opinions that concur with their own.

So, what do we look for or find in other peoples words to make us think; ‘Hey I like what that person has to say’?

I know when I see something that strikes a chord within me; it makes me want to respond or react. It could be anything at anytime. Yet, is there a specific element that qualifies one opinion to hold more credence or appeal than another? Is there an essential mix that creates a good opinion? Can we ever all fully agree on one thing?

Is a good opinion one that matches with our own personal belief systems and affiliations? What encourages us to agree with another person; is it something we do because we feel in awe of that person? Perhaps, we want to reciprocate something they have done for us, so we agree with them? Or do we want to pay homage merely to feather our own nests?

Are some opinions more important to us than others?

Opinions are part of our ‘mundane’ every life. I mean, everyone has an opinion on something; what they prefer for breakfast and why, what country they like to visit for holidays and why, what political party they choose to follow and why. Yet, opinions are powerful if directed correctly; they change the way we perceive things and the world around us. Isn’t it therefore a privilege to be able to know what other people think or believe, even if we don’t concur?

Or, maybe every topic of conversation has already been covered so thoroughly, that now we are just reinventing the wheel by discussing the same things? Are opinions boring? I don’t think they are, but then that is my opinion!

It is highly therapeutic for me to share my words, and other peoples! Discussing and debating is part and parcel to my life, without these things it would be a dull existence. I urge people to speak their minds, and I listen carefully to what is being said even if I don’t agree. Likewise, I read carefully what is written.

Do we all truly hear the words being spoken or read the words written? Or do we switch off if the message conflicts with what we want to see and hear? Do we see and hear merely what we want to? Do we then misconstrue the message? Do we ever listen to others opinions and words; or are we all just waiting for our turn to speak?

Putting it simply; do we really care what others have to say or write?

I KNOW I CARE!! I hope I am not alone?!

Maybe you might think there are too many opinions, so many that they get lost in the background? Or is there not enough? What is missing in the grand world of opinions that needs to be said?

Any ideas to share???

What We Reap………

A case of reaping what you sow……………..