“Spotted”


I must admit, reading about “Spotted” in the news once again came as no surprise to me. Sadly, it seems everyday a new wave of internet indecency or nastiness becomes part of the norm.

And, make no mistake, the materials posted upon “Spotted” are particularly grotesque. But, I still have to question; aren’t such materials in many ways merely an expression of freedom, and of being human?

In truth, it is completely normal and part of everyday life – men and women will look at, talk about, fantasise about and trade lewd comments/pictures of the opposite sex. They don’t need the internet for this either.

So, I have to ask – how far is too far on the internet?

And, has “Spotted” reached, breached and exceeded the limits?

For those of you who don’t know what ‘Spotted’ is, allow me to provide you with some shockingly foul-mouthed quotes which illustrates it clearly (warning – profanities follow);

That blonde haired girl who just walked into the 2nd floor of the library is fucking banging – ‘Spotted: Reading University Library’ (3718 likes).

To the dirty skank… for gods sake buy some new leggings!! jesus christ! i can see your minge! [sic] – ‘Spotted: Swansea University Campus’ (2407 likes).

To the girl talking about harry potter. i think your arse might be a horcrux, im gonna have to destroy it tonight – ‘Spotted: Kent Uni Library’ (4209 likes).

These comments are typical examples of what “Spotted” has to offer. Male university students and their velvet tongues, produce one disgusting comment after another, and it is shrugged off as a type of compliment that their female peers should enjoy receiving.

“Spotted” pages are in fact part of the Facebook family. They are pages that encourage students to write comments and messages about their peers, which are published anonymously by page administrators. Many of the pages target specific universities (each page supposedly run by a student at that institution), with hundreds of different pages appearing on Facebook. Many of the pages have been liked thousands of times.

The “about” sections of most of the pages innocent enough, they encourage students to share funny incidents, grievances or secret crushes, but the reality is very different. Many of the pages consist of heavily sexualised and offensive comments about students’ appearance and sexuality, and female students are targeted with particularly misogynistic comments.

To the stuck up slut who looked at me as if I’d just slipped a finger up her grandma… –‘Spotted: University of Portsmouth Library’ (7460 likes).

Some posts include images, seemingly uploaded without the subjects’ knowledge or consent.

A current post on the ‘Spotted: University of Essex’ page (3955 likes) shows a young woman sitting at a computer, apparently unaware of the fact that her underwear is exposed above the waistband of her trousers, or of the fact that she is being photographed from behind. The caption on the photograph reads: “Nice bit a crack in the reading room.” [sic]

Another picture featuring a female student, again taken from behind and apparently without consent, appears on the “Spotted: Coventry University” page (4097 likes), captioned: “Asian girls and their asses though.” Several of the posts nastily blend racism with sexism.

A post appearing on the ‘Spotted: Hotty in Hartley Library’ page (3493 likes), displays a picture of a female student from behind, and asks fellow students to identify her so the poster “can get on that”.

Many posts inform female students what their male peers would like to do to them, or are doing while watching them:

To the girl on the c+ floor with the red toshiba laptop… i was sitting next to you a few hours ago. I literally couldn’t take my hand out of my pants the whole time. [sic]

To the hot girl sitting opposite me on level 3, do you mind if I have a cheeky danger wank whilst looking at you?

To the sexy brunette on the 4th floor, will you be my girlfrien? I didn’t add the D because you’ll get that later.

 Others veer from sexual objectification towards bullying:

 To the girl in the floor 4 toilets, you’re not Niagara falls, at some point you’ve gotta stop flowing.

The fat bird standing by the printers on the first floor. Don’t want to shag, but could really do with a cuddle.

Is it all in good fun??

A National Union of Students study reveals that 68% of female students experience sexual harassment during their time at university, and one in seven are seriously physically or sexually assaulted. These statistics actually shocked me; I didn’t know this was the case, and I doubt many female students (current or future) would know either.

So, how harmless are such pages if they feed into a wider student culture which increasingly treats young women as sexual prey?

And, do such pages merely demonstrate, and ensure that sexual harassment infiltrates every part of the academic arena to the point that there are no limits?

I then wonder;

Does “Spotted” encapsulate a new culture of objectification, harassment and misogyny?

How can this freedom of speech be curtailed, or, should it be?

Is “Spotted” just boys being boys or is it more sinister than that?

If you or your daughter were on the receiving end of such grotesque comments, how would you react?

All I can say;

I am thankful “Spotted” didn’t exist when I was a student. It was daunting enough entering the new environment of a large university, leaving home, being frightened, unsure and anxious over everything. I certainly wouldn’t have appreciated contending with this form of bullying and harassment too.

“Spotted” is childish, dangerous, aggressive, soul destroying and cowardly; not the best way to demonstrate what a UK university education can teach you.

Perhaps, a little less lady spotting and a little more studying wouldn’t go amiss.    

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The Man-Child


Over grown, over educated (maybe even still in full time education whilst in their 30’s), living with family or friends (like some frat house experience), no commitment, if employed working on some type of made up position derived from some internship, opinionated, socially uncomfortable, self absorbed, full of their own self importance, stuck in their ways and clinging onto what they are used to, domineering, shifty body language, uncomfortable around women and women’s opinions.

The man-child.

Oh, and let us not forget when he cannot get people to succumb to his wants, needs, desires or whatever, he throws a tantrum. He demonstrates inappropriate anger in inappropriate ways to unsuspecting people.

Such a horrible specimen of ‘manhood’ was in my presence last night.

I have joined some social meet up groups within the Madrid area, and one of these was the Skeptics Group. Yes a skeptics group! Now usually I refrain form associating with Philosophers in general, why, well as a rule I have found them to be, I don’t want to generalise too much here; full of their own self importance, and of their own intellectual status. Yet, the group sounded interesting, so I thought I’d go along and see.

For some reason the organiser, the usual organiser, decided he couldn’t return from Germany for the meeting. So, he randomly nominated me as the stand in organiser for the meeting. As I explained to him, I was not familiar with Skeptical theory and it was my first meeting. Yet, this did not bother the organiser.

OK, well I assumed the group would be a nice bunch of individuals; understanding, able to listen, oh, and respectful of others. So, what the Hell, I gave it a go!

Throughout the meeting I felt a bad vibe from the only man in attendance (the friend, and associate of the actual group organiser). Now, the group was small, four including me – three women and one man. Yet, he wasn’t interested in us as people, he didn’t ask us anything about ourselves, our life or background. He was very clinical and odd. Strange body language, shifty and as though he wasn’t too happy with how the discussion was progressing.

Maybe he felt threatened by the female presence, frustrated he hadn’t been nominated stand in organiser by his friend (the actual organiser), perhaps he misconstrued some of what had been said (he was Spanish, and I think his English level wasn’t as good as he thought it was). I wonder if our native English tongue intimidated him, plus, the fact we didn’t necessarily agree with his opinions and views might have riled him too. Who can be sure!

It wasn’t until the conversation split; him and one woman, and me and the other woman present. I spoke only to say I had to leave soon, as I was tired, nothing much more. well, when I related this to him, he didn’t like this and decided to ‘flip out’. Only way to really describe it, he flipped out!

It was like he had been waiting patiently all night to say something, to cause an argument with me, and why, who knows, and who knows what bee was in in his bonnet!

Anyway, he accused me of lying, the reason I was leaving was another that I was too afraid to admit, I was being untruthful about my thoughts and feelings. I was concealing something from him!

What the………!! Did I just doze off, and wake only to find I had arrived in the Twilight Zone?

I had only just met him – two hours previous, and already he was convinced he knew my inner motives, he knew what I truly felt. I mean, if he had, he would have known I was thinking what a loser he was being at that particular moment! It seemed he was trying to depict me as this distrustful liar to the group for a reason. Wow, what insight, NO, what rude audacity!

I took it lightly, an argument with what was obviously an aggressive man was not on my list of ‘to do’s’ that day. So I said,
“Is he joking with me? He is fooling around right, he doesn’t mean it as I think he does”?
One of the women then replied,
“Yeah, he is fooling around, as no one would act like such an arse-hole” (jest intended to lighten the obvious prevailing bad atamosphere).

Oh dear, that was a mistake. He then turned his venom upon her.

Now my understanding of Spanish profanities is limited, as I am a lady 🙂 Yet, I am pretty damn sure he used everything in his arsenal to create one moment of utter hatred, which was aimed at an unsuspecting woman.

I was aghast. I was already standing up to go, and I could only just stand there, in complete shock. I didn’t know what the Hell he was playing at and why. I wondered whether it was a good idea to lurch across the table and spank him! Yet, the woman he spoke to with such a vile, and disgusting attitude was so calm; as too was the other woman witnessing it! They were cool and level headed, intelligent, articulate and capable women- admirable.

I was a little less cool; thinking and feeling, WTF!

For me, this is a massive NO! People, especially men, never speak to women as he was doing to this one. I was disgusted. I was shocked. I realised in that moment, this was no man, this was not a person worth my attention or time. He was nothing.

I told them all that I was leaving, and won’t be returning any time soon to a group with such a vile fool in attendance. It made no difference though, as he kept on; he had his argument, he was making himself feel better at any cost.

Intelligent, philosopher, man, human – NO, he was just an over grown child, an insecure and idiotic fool with a foul mouth.

I remember he said he had a blog. He said he had been writing about his attempts to meet a new person every week. What a sick joke! That was exactly what he was doing within the ‘skeptics group’, and look how he treated and responding to them, to us! God help those he does meet, they will be psychologically scared for life if he acts as he did with us!

This has made me really reconsider which groups I attend.

If there aren’t shouting bullies, there are pervy men trying their luck, and staring at your breasts and bum.

How am I ever supposed to meet nice, and genuine people in Madrid? Do they actually exist?

What this has suggested, though I hate to even consider it; women are never really able to go anywhere without feeling they maybe harassed at any moment.

Why is it men feel they have some power to weild over women?

Why can’t they just go out, and enjoy themselves free of being abusive bad mannerly fools, bombastic and opinionated chauvinists, and sexual predators?

Are all men really just versions of men-children?

As you can probably guess, I am still extremely annoyed by this ‘person’s’ behaviour. It has impressed some ‘downer’ upon me regarding human relationships, interactions and behaviour. Plus, this fool will never know nor admit he was in the wrong.

Also, to sum up the whole experience or night; the whole thing was some elaborate charade. It was some game set up by this nasty and foul mouth fool, and his friend the Skeptics Group organiser. It was as though they had planned such an end, it was as though they were setting us up for this, to test us in some way.

Sounds paranoid? Well, having witnessed the behaviour and considered the motives, and the things that just didn’t add up about the group, that weren’t bona fide about the night in general – this is my only conclusion. At least my conclusion isn’t a diatribe of disgusting profanities, though it could have been quite easily after what occurred!

Oh, and if you find yourself in Madrid, avoid the Skeptics Meet-up Group at all cost!

If You Tolerate This………..


And THIS is a product of a healthy society?? Yeah, right!

And THIS is a product of a healthy society?? Yeah, right!

……….Where-in the HELL will it end??????!!!!!!!!

The issue of these disgusting Facebook pages makes me sick to my stomach. Where is the debate here at all?? It is simple for me; REMOVE ALL THE ABUSIVE AND SICK PAGES, and REMOVE THEM NOW!!!!

Rape, abuse and God knows what else – what part does any of that play in social networking? I mean what a conversation starter between long lost friends; “Hey great to speak to you again Steve, yeah, I’m an Engineer now, I drive a BMW and oh, yeah, did I mention I’m a wife beater and rapist – soon to be a Daddy too”. SICK, SICK, SICK; and another word, debauched.

What a twisted world we live in, and what low life scum inhabit it. Times like these make me ashamed to call myself a human being.

The men responsible for such things are surely on some ‘Most Wanted Psycho Killer’ list somewhere or another, if not, they will be.

There is nothing amusing about this sick content, and nothing which should be classed as anyone’s right to express. This is not liberating and progressive, but harmful and debase. In a civil society there is no room for such cruel, moronic and misogynist attitudes.

Ban abusive Facebook pages NOW!!!!! Stop quibbling over T&C’s and everything else; what is more important here, people and their lives or bloody paperless contracts for internet jibber jabber.

Facebook PLEASE get your priorities right once and for all!

Your Fat And You Know It!


Katie Price - Glamour Model

Katie Price – Glamour Model

Another celebrity slap down, in the sense of spiteful name calling, the type of which belongs in the playground and to  childhood antics.

This time it is loud mouthed Katie Price on the rampage, yet again.

The ‘much loved’ glamour model v’s the more ‘demure’ Kelly Brook.

Katie slammed Kelly for looking considerably larger than she used to, akin to the size of a ‘heffer’ by all accounts.

This ‘your fat’ statement, didn’t go down too well, especially on that font of all knowledge ‘Twitter’.

Pathetic – I mean really, a grown woman clawing the eyes out of another grown woman. Why, just to be in the media spot light, just because she felt threatened by another women and she had to reclaim her throne as ‘queen bee’.

What can be gained by it??? What motivated it – jealousy?? Probably.

Why would a woman jump on the ‘women hating’ band wagon – there are enough ‘haters’ on that wagon by now! Can’t women have reprieve and actually like one another, themselves and support each other for once; instead of ripping shreds out of each other – like we are all in competition or something, for what exactly??????? Men???????

Ridiculous.

Isn’t there enough negative body image permeating the ‘rags’ that pass as newspapers???

Isn’t there, and hasn’t there been enough; back biting, bitching, positive reinforcement for anorexia, dissolution, low self esteem, self hatred, negative body image and zero confidence amongst women all over the world??????

Aren’t there enough women struggling to accept themselves without Katie Price, or anyone else for that matter, digging other women for being a normal size, and actually naturally beautiful rather than plastic manufactured or starved.

I think Kelly Brook was quite dignified though, regardless of Katie’s petulance towards her. Miss Brook said it well; Katie’s attitude and behaviour was “unladylike” – and so it was, and also peevish, petty, spiteful, jealous, hateful, crazed – and the list goes on and on!!!

So why in this day and age – the 21st century, are women still being restrained by a corset, which is in reality society. The laces, hooks and eyes in that corset are all the expectations, self imposed ideals, objectifications, judgements, negativity. prejudices and so on and so on. Women are still binding themselves up with this ‘feminine’ concept; this ideal of what a women is or isn’t, should or shouldn’t be; but the goal posts always change.

Women want equality or to be accepted as they are, and yet they cannot accept themselves, they cannot cut themselves some slack. It seems to me this is biggest contradiction that remains!!!!!

So, with February the 14th looming – no not Valentines’ Day, but the campaign ‘1 Billion Rising’; how can women stand up and be counted and protest against hatred, violences and so so????? When women are their own worst enemies, and do damage to themselves everyday by providing the ammunition for others to use against them??????????????

OPINIONS PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I WANT TO HAVE YOUR THOUGHTS ON THIS TOPIC :

Women ‘hating’ on each other – what can this prove, what can this solve???????????????

Does such antics cause self loathing in other women??????????  

Are the media encouraging the perpetuation of negativity for women to indulge in????????? 

Are women in competition with one another; do women see other women as a threat?????????

Are women their own worst enemies?????????????????

Is it a case of a male dominated society controlling women’s minds???????????

Are men to blame???????????

Do men want to see a certain ‘brand’ of women only???????????? 

State YOUR piece – tell me YOUR thoughts…………………….

My Dress Is Not A Yes


The Slutwalk

The Slutwalk

‘My dress is not a yes’!! Chanted the thousands at London’s Slutwalk. What is a Slutwalk, well, they are demonstrations to reclaim the word slut to prevent it being used against women as a derogatory term, and female reaction over how some idiots from the male of the species treat them.

What sparked this new wave of female demonstrations? A comment made by a Canadian police officer during a health and safety talk to students; ‘Avoid dressing like sluts’ he told them, and this will supposedly be enough to prevent victimisation and rape.

Since this one comment thousands of women across the globe have taken to the streets outraged that; women wearing skimpy clothing = the right for men to abuse them.

It is quite strange that in today’s society where women are bombarded with images of sex and sexy from every media outlet available, that when they then succumb to what the media peddle, the world soon retaliates against them.

I thought sex and sexy was not to be questioned by people. I thought these images weren’t classed as offensive or shocking now?! Aren’t half naked women the norm for our society?

Well, apparently these images of female ‘sexuality’ can be criticised, but only when it is convenient to excuse a heinous act of vile violence that a man perpetrates; rape. Women wearing skimpy outfits then quickly become a target, their clothing magically converted into some green light for wannabe rapists. After all if a woman dresses for sex, she must want sex, lots of it and from any ‘Tom, Dick, or Harry’. WRONG!

Yet, a woman dresses sexy or provocatively to attract male attention, and entice sexual desire; surely that cannot be denied, otherwise why else reveal more flesh? Not necessarily so. Women are notorious for dressing to impress other women actually; and no not because they are lesbians, but because they want other women to envy what they are wearing or how they look.

So, when some men see a woman out and about, and these men feel inclined to make a sweeping generalisation that ‘she has to be looking for sex’ or by wearing that oh so tight dress ‘she is asking for it’; consider this, that is your assumption based on faulty logic produced by your testes.

That idea of a woman and what she wants are stereotypes built up in those men’s minds, therefore not based on truth or fact. Rape should not be the by product of any woman’s wardrobe choice; that act has no justification, regardless of how short a woman wears her skirt.

Truth is a woman should be able to walk around naked if she chose to and never fear being raped by some men who cannot control their own mind or bodies. Question; if these men can’t control their own mind or bodies then why are they being allowed to wander the streets alone, without supervision?

Yet there will always be some men who will always argue that if a woman wears such and such, and goes out to a club, and is out after a certain time at night, and flirts and drinks alcohol and goes against her nature by wanting lots of sex with many different men; well, then that woman cannot expect anything less than being raped.

Yet this notion is a double standard based on bigotry and chauvinism. In society women are supposed to be sexually liberated, available and willing, yet, if they are then they are sluts, they deserve to be raped. Women may lust after men, have sex, want sex and enjoy sex, they might not want babies or marriage and maybe they drink more than a small Sherry at Christmas, but rape is still rape!

Maybe it is the skewed version of society branded and sold so well by the media, marketing and advertising executives to blame. After all men and women live in a world dominated by sexualised imagery, which are meant to entice, inspire, motivate and of course brain wash us all.

So, within the real world there also exists a make believe fantasy version where images of submissive, permissive, eager to please and sexually in need women permeate through to us all. These images included the naked, half naked and dressed sexily. Surely then these images (man made too usually) are the visions of lust that fuel some men’s minds and beliefs about women, women’s roles and what women want? Especially when women are then encouraged to emulate these false images too.

So, it is once again a case for objectification. Some men being manipulated to see women as objects, sex objects, just a body or even part of a body; but never as a person, not real, not human, not someone to identify with who is more than mere sexual parts and desires, more than merely their sex.

Maybe this objectification creates rape?

Or maybe rape is about power, domination and control? It is an attack, someone exerting themselves over another to harm and create submission. Being attacked creates fear, receives a reaction, puts the victim in their place and shows them who is ‘boss’. Is this what rape is?

Rape has no excuse, not one and there is NO negotiation on the word NO. There are no arguments that can OK rape in any society; it is never justified, never.

For me if a person cannot understand the sentiment behind the non-ambiguous, simple enough two lettered word that is NO, then you shouldn’t be even engaging in any type of sexual intimacy These people obviously have missed some fundamental learning process that most of get loud and clear; NO means and always has meant NO, and sex without consent is RAPE!!!!