This Is Frustrating

I found a great little job site for applying for work here in Madrid, yet, the application process SUCKS!!!

I can’t upload my own CV, which far surpasses the useless and limited electronic version the site has for every candidate to use. It is OK if every candidate is Spanish, but I am not, and the jobs being advertised on the site aren’t all for Spanish speakers or Spanish companies!!!

The CV on the site didn’t even have the ‘pull down’ option on there for MY degree, what the Hell!!! It couldn’t get my age correct either!! It also required either NIE (certificate of residency) or passport number – which is highly confidential information to part with, and leave lying around on an online job site, which could be hacked any time, and my complete identity then stolen!! In the UK such personal identification would NEVER be required until the interview stage or, until an actual job offer has been made.

The site also required me to input a Spanish telephone number, which I haven’t got. I don’t want one either!!!! I didn’t see the need to transfer my contract over to a Spanish contract, especially as mobile contracts are expensive here. I use texts more than calls, here, Spanish people use calls more than texts – who the Hell am I gonna call and chat to?? I don’t have an endless contact list!!!

The other down side – everything on the site’s CV was in Spanish. Yet, the jobs I wanted to apply for are not advertised in Spanish, are not for Spanish speakers, but Native English speakers. Therefore, as a non-fluent Spanish speaker – the whole site was a tad frustrating to navigate – and most of it wasn’t applicable to me!!!!

It was a classic catch 22. I need to be in a Spanish working environment to learn more Spanish, and yet getting a job to help me do that – is a nightmare! So, I rely on applying for English speaking only positions to help me get somewhere; but this is no better, as the application process is in Spanish!

Barriers, and then some!!!!!

The etiquette for interviews, and for meting people in a business capacity is completely wrong too! There is no follow up, the only option is; come at this time, this date, to this venue – there is NO, can you make this? Is this OK for you? Let us confirm this 100%. There is NO response to confirm or responses to answer questions – its just – this, that and nothing more. If that is no good for you, well, tough – and DON’T contact us again! How is that conducive for business or organisations to run?? Why can’t they clarify what is required?? Why can’t they communicate and decide what is best for all parties concerned?? How does anything ever get done if there is no negotiation and communication, just orders?!

As a candidate or enquirer about volunteering, info on jobs, organising meetings and so on, you have to do all the chasing too. Without two way communication you are often left hanging with no real answers, clarification or a way to progress. Basically, it is a one time only offer; unless you comply to what they want, when they want it and how they want it, you as a candidate or enquirer are up the creak without a paddle.

No wonder so many people here in Spain are unemployed!!!!!!!

I am at least, seemingly, making headway with volunteering. I am trying once more to arrange a meeting to discuss what I can do, and they can do – and so on and so on. Fingers crossed this will all be done and dusted by next week!!!!! Fingers crossed!!!!

Who Is Pulling The Strings?

I hate it when I’m in the moment, and giving it all full throttle about how I feel, think, fear or whatever else – assuming, wrongly, that I am engaged in a conversation with the person opposite from me; when suddenly they decide to cut me dead, and leave me hanging!!!

They are quite content to dismiss my words with a pointless, and patronising interjection – what the Hell!!! Its like having something thrown at your head that was completely unexpected, a fly in your very nice soup, tripping over as you enter a store full of people – it is a horrible feeling!

These annoying people ALWAYS ASSUME they know exactly what I mean, think, feel or want and blatantly, THEY DON’T!!! How can they if they don’t listen!! What happened exactly?? Did this person possess me while I was sleeping, taking over my inner workings without me becoming aware? Yeah right!

In other words, let me perhaps misinterpret what they feel, think, mean and want for a change, so they know how annoying it is; they basically know better than me, therefore they don’t need to listen to me as what I have to say is as pointless as pickles on toast!

By being flippant about what I am trying to convey, regardless of the subject matter under discussion, patronising interjections make my words less significant. My words, feelings, thoughts, ideas, wants, opinions et al are belittled and yes, dismissed. These ‘Boss Hogs’ have seized the power in the ‘conversation’ – yet, what can anyone gain from a one sided conversation? They mustn’t get far in life must they.

Regardless of my emphatic protests against their continued assumptions, they continue to raise their barriers with the ‘I don’t care’ attitude, ‘I am always right and know everything’.

I just want to scream; ‘who made you the puppet master’? ‘Who the Hell are you to be nominated as judge and jury’? ‘Listen and perhaps you’ll then know’! ‘Quit jumping the gun and assuming things, as that really makes YOU appear to be a  bombastic, self obsessed ASS’!

Don’t take me and my feelings, needs, words and wants for granted please!!!!!!! YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT I MEAN, YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING, YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT I WANT – so quit telling me YOU do!!!

 

10 Things I Hate

Pic from: hartlove.wordpress.com

 

Going on our merry way through life, we all tend to pick up things that rankle us. Whether they are designed for such purposes or not, they do.

Sometimes it is as though the universe itself converges upon me, just with one thought at heart; to annoy, cause disharmony, disrupt and blatantly infuriate me!

With all this in mind I sat down and considered, funnily enough not for long, what my top ten most hated things were (in relation to situations mainly).

So, here they are – enjoy and hopefully you can empathise too?!

1. Where ever you sit down or park your car – doesn’t matter how empty a place is, someone HAS TO situate themselves near you. WHY? Is it herd mentality?

2. Bad manners. Now this I cannot abide. Manners cost nothing. It is a sign of courtesy, a display of appreciation which makes everyone’s day a little more pleasant. Whether it is a ‘thank you’ or holding a door open for someone; the sentiment behind the act is priceless.

3. People who wear summer clothing just because they see a glint of sunshine in February (or any other time of year when it is equally as freezing cold)!!

4. Those people who never truly listen, but merely wait for their turn to speak. This is not conversation, this is not empathy, this is not courteous. This type of discourse only makes for frustration, and a feeling of being under-valued.

5. People who bring all their problems to your door, but when you need an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on they run for the hills. This is not friendship, but a free counselling service!

6. Queues. Whichever queue you join it will be the one that takes the longest to get served. Fact!

7. People who drive whilst brushing their hair and applying make-up, speaking on a mobile phone, texting their friends, whilst reading a map or whilst using a laptop (yes, I actually have witnessed a truck driver doing this very thing)!

8. People who do not know the meaning of giving way whilst walking on a sidewalk. They negotiate the sidewalks as badly as they drive. I know here in Madrid getting from A to B can be a free for all – pushing and shoving, whole groups of people blocking your path and taking over the whole sidewalk; even dogs and children running into you. I hate it – MOVE OVER and let other people be on their way PLEASE! Regardless of what you may think, you DON’T own the sidewalk!!!

9. People who just STARE at you for no reason, as though they haven’t seen another human being in about 10 years. WHY!  

10. People who inflict their BAD ATTITUDES on you for no reason other than you happen to be near them at that moment. I actually experienced this quite recently whilst I was visiting my Grandmother in Accident and Emergency. Some psycho woman thought it was OK to ‘get up in my face’ just because she was having a bad day. Like I wasn’t!!!! Oh well, she was having a bad day, well then that behaviour is excused and all is OK – just go ahead and make my day even more awful, just as long as you get all your anger off your chest; errr, NO!

Just 10 things?? WOW, I really feel I could ‘vent’ 10 more!!!!

WHAT ABOUT YOU??? Have any of YOU anything to add to my modest list of annoyances????

PLEASE – LET ME KNOW!!!!!!!     

Welcome To No Sleep Anonymous……..

Awake and counting the hours till Dawn……….

Well, I have to say I am physically exhausted and now must be running on adrenalin. I am not sleeping very well at night; in fact I deem 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep as Heavenly bliss!

What the Hell is going on I don’t know, and I don’t like it either.

I can only think it is my brain to blame. I have had this problem off and on throughout my life, and it seems to coincide with having too much going on in my life at one time. I can’t seem to flick the off button on my brain; consequently my mind runs on, and on, and on – all day and all night.

I know it is no good for me, I mean when I was 14 and 15 in school no sleep meant nothing, but now, ummm, its a big difference. I mean it isn’t as though I’m a big ‘mover and shaker’ in the world, but my world, doesn’t matter how small, means too much to me to waste it lying around on the couch and feeling like a zombie.

I envy people who can just switch off and sleep the sleep of the dead. Let me clarify, I don’t mean the actual dead, I mean a heavy sleep where nothing rouses the sleeper or disturbs them. I read how sleep is important to health, and we should all have 6-8 hours a night to maintain our well-being. OK, I get that, but is not as though I am avoiding sleep on purpose, if I could I would sleep, but I can’t!!! My body just won’t submit to sleep, not unless its 100% in the zone, and it never really is (does this make sense). I am like the ‘Princess and the Pea’; any little thing and my brain detects it as an annoyance. I then can’t settle.

I am so desperate to switch off, though I don’t advocate them, I have been day dreaming about sleeping tablets! The relief the thought of having them provides is weirdly comforting. I JUST WANNA SLEEP!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, none of this is really consequential! It isn’t the end of the world, nobody has died and I am not facing mortal jeopardy. Yet, I think this all clearly explains my erratic mind, twitchy feeling of restlessness, my odd behaviour, apathy and lethargy towards everything, my wandering ideas and over sensitivity, oh and the sprinkling of paranoia.

Please let me sleep tonight, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!

Is There Anybody Out There………

I could scream, but I won’t

I’m having a bit of a bad day today. Not feeling my usual jubilant and positive self, maybe the lack of sleep is eventually taking its toll upon me, who knows.

Anyway, I have been feeling quite disheartened about writing. Racking my brains and pulling my hair out over this whole quest of mine to ‘write’. Its not just the The Publishing Ladder
that is bugging me, as I have GIVEN UP on that for the time being; I can’t juggle what I have going on at the moment anyway!!!! I feel guilty enough that I am pouring my time, and energy into researching and writing, thinking and feeling the work, only to neglect most other things; including sleep and practising Spanish.

I wish there were at least 3 of me so I could do all the things I need to. Yes I am becoming a Bundle Of Nerves

Though, I try not to over think things and defeat myself, I do; it is just too easy a conquest.

Consequently today I am unenthusiastic, and to be honest angry. This has been building in me for a while. I have to say, or write, that I am fed up of being ignored, giving my best in things and being kicked to the curb (to reuse and over used Americanism). I am sick of feeling like a ‘poor relation’ over looked and under estimated.

I have raised questions that some don’t wish to answer, and that is fine, but I thought opinions were up for general discussion?? Or why else raise them?? Is merely concurring with one view the way it has to be?? I appreciate many views, but many people don’t seem to appreciate that way of being! What’s the golden handshake then? What am I missing???

Please enlighten me people before I truly do go crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!

That is of course assuming anyone will ever read or comment on this drop in the ocean post of mine.

The end!