Home » Society: Norms & Expectations » Birthday Blues? Not me!

Birthday Blues? Not me!

It’s that time of year when I begin looking forward to my Birthday.

In a little over two weeks I will be officially another year older. For some this might be an occasion to dread, but for me, I am ambivalent. 

Another year, so what! Who cares! Life is measured in more than merely age. For me, it’s what I’m doing with the years that means more than the age I am, have been or will be. 

I am not one of those people who wish to be eighteen again; never liked being eighteen when I was eighteen, so why would I want to go back and re-live it! Although, I do have friends who would give their right arm to be eighteen again, and I wonder why. What is so lack lustre about their current time and space that makes being eighteen again look so appealing? 

I might not be eighteen, but I’m not exactly Methuselah either. Just yesterday I got asked for ID to purchase alcohol, I was highly bemused. I wasn’t afraid to produce the said ID and declare my age, I was more mortified of the fact my drivers licence has such a ghastly picture on it; I cringe every time I have to show it to a stranger! 

So why does age, an increase in a number, bother us so much?

What makes eighteen OK and thirty (plus) such a shameful thing? 

Why do people feel their life is over once they leave their teens or even their twenties? I just don’t get it! 

I think this is where Spanish makes me smile. ¿Cuántos años tienes? Which is asking, how many years do you have. It’s not asking, how OLD are you, it’s asking about the years of life you have under your belt. It’s far nicer than discussing oldness! 

Who is old anyway?

No one feels old. What does old feel like? 

We’re all just subjects of our time and space, we don’t wake up one day and say; ‘you know what, I feel old’. 

This is where western society seems to hold the answer. It is obsessed with age, oldness, wrinkles, grey hair, plastic surgery, recapturing a lost youth. Well, growing older is going to happen to all of us at some time or another. That’s what we share, a commonality, we will age. No amount of plastic surgery will change a biological age, it won’t stop time from ticking by. 

We are not Dorian Grey, we are not immortal, we are human and we all age! 

So, I may be looking at another year under my belt, but, my life won’t come to an end. Time marches on regardless of my age, time ticks on and so it should. I am not going to dread being older, I am not going to cry, I am older and wiser and more experienced.


Your life is an occasion, so rise to it!

I do not fear a number! I am made if sterner stuff than that! So, bring on my Birthday, I can’t wait for the cake! 


25 thoughts on “Birthday Blues? Not me!

  1. Great post, SS. I think plastic surgery is one of the saddest things our civilization has ever come up with. I have almost fifty-nine years, and wouldn’t want to be eighteen again, either. I hope your birthday was wonderful.

    • Thank you for reading and leaving me a comment, I appreciate it!! I agree with you – I just feel it encourages people to detest themselves. It also helps to create general unacceptance of the natural and inevitable aging processes, which is sad. Yes, 18 isn’t the pinnacle of life – for me age is merely a number. Thanks, yes it was good 🙂

  2. In anticipation of you moving up one integer on the integer number scale in ten days’ time, I would like to wish you an early, very Happy Birthday.

    My opinion on the obsession with youth is that it seems to be due to people having wasted their years of youth when they were young — via whoring themselves out Miley-and-Robin-style — and then decaying away in their thirties as their biological clocks start winding down.
    I personally think the obsession with eighteen has more to do with ‘looking’ 18, and not ‘being’ 18, again. That way, I guess, they can continue to whore-out the rest of their lives — or something like that.

  3. I’m not going to wish you a happy birthday yet. I do agree that our society is obsessed with youth, which is odd, since accomplishment takes time, which is much more important for societies prolonged existence. Funny how you say we are humans, and not Dorian Grey. Aside from his appearance, there was nothing human about Dorian Grey. Even before he became immortal, he was vain, cold and cruel, and his immortality stripped him of all other characteristics. I happen to know quite a few people who are idolized by society for their youth and looks. Many of them seem superficial and vacant.

    • Well, my Birthday isn’t for another 12 days, so you have plenty of time. Yes, this is too true – I agree with you. Ah, Dorian Grey, I have to admit I threw him in because I love the book, and have a strange infatuation with Mr Grey. I think Mr Wilde wrote that character as a strange sort of parody of himself. Considering Mr Wilde ranked quite highly on the sociopath scale, not surprised Dorian was devoid of humanity. Although, most humans I know have a few Dorian characteristics! I don’t know anyone revered for their youth et al, only fictional characters, IE celebrities, but yes, they seem to be glib and vacuous. Seems society prefers that, as it’s less of a challenge!

      • The printery I guard also has a photo studio on the premises, so we get plenty of models. It’s kind of hard not to get to know a few of them. Some are wonderful people, but many are self-obsessed, vacuous and really nasty

        • Ah, I see, I imagine that is the case. I do know a few models, or ex models. I have a male friend who in his youth was quite a successful model. I admit he remains a dreadful flirt and a little egotistical, but otherwise quite a down to earth, genuine, funny guy, also a gentleman, which is never a bad thing. He is the only one I associate with now though, the others I knew were too self obsessed and quite insecure. I think constant competition and the looming threat from others they deem as better than themselves makes them quite odd creatures. I thought they were bad influences on those around them, and very wearing to be around!

  4. Happy Birthday in advance. I love your attitude and think it will make you a happier, more fulfilled person than if you were reaching for the past instead of embracing the present.

    I have definitely improved with time. The more years I have, the more wisdom and clarity I develop about who I am and how I want to live. I hated being 18 too; had fun in my 20s but look back now and think how shallow I was. I lost the last part of my 30s to post-natal depression and have finally burst into my 50s a happier, healthier, funnier more worthwhile person.

    • Thanks for that Su! Very kind of you, I just feel life is too short to be caught up with only focusing on age and youth. I never believed that just because a person is 30 and over, that they were automatically consigned to being old. I hate that word! I’ve aways valued having good friends who were older than me, and I enjoyed their company far more than most of the people who were my own age. I always say age is a number and how you feel and perceive is more important.
      Thanks for sharing your own experiences, it’s nice to know someone else out there wasn’t fond of being eighteen! I am happy you are happy now, in your own time and space, that is great to hear! I wish you continued happiness, fun and good living!
      Thanks again, Bex

  5. I love this phrase! ‘Your life is an occasion, so rise to it!’ My 42nd birthday is in 14 days…I not only look forward to it, I relish in it.

    I knew you were kindred from the moment I first read your blog. Taureans do have a way about them 😉

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