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Trading Places


I was simply outraged when my boyfriend related to me how one of his Spanish colleagues had suggested that he ought to ‘trade me in’ for a Spanish girlfriend or bed partner!!

What am I exactly?? A possession, a piece of meat??

What is the reasoning for this colleague even suggesting such a thing; well, apparently my boyfriend would learn Spanish much better without me in tow!!

Oh, it was meant as a ‘joke’ – hahahaha  – can you all hear me laughing?!

I don’t find it funny, not one iota. Not for me as I am the brunt of the said joke, the object of jest.

It makes the situation more precarious, as currently we are not in the same country as one another. I am in the UK (STILL), and my boyfriend is in Madrid. So, even knowing that someone would say something so off the cuff about me, and our relationship, to my boyfriend of umpteen years, hurts me.

They don’t know me – they have never met me or even spoken to me. They know nothing of substance about my boyfriend really, or about our relationship and all the time we have been together through thick and thin.

This to me speaks volumes for the person who made that comment or suggestion. It is callous and superficial.
Oh she no longer suits your purpose as she isn’t Spanish, so as you can’t get what you want from her any longer, dump her and get someone else who you can use for your current needs‘.

Why is it these ‘men’ think women are disposable objects?? Why is it that I can’t trip the light fandango with a Spanish man, why is it always assumed the bloke will do a runner???

I know my fella doesn’t want to do a runner, if he did, well, he would, same for me too. I trust him and he trusts me – so my fury lies with the colleague and not my fella.

Would this colleague decide to do something as nasty and calculating to his own partner or wife? Perhaps so.  Throw over someone he had spent a lifetime with to fulfill his own selfish ends, yes, and that is what we call love folks – errrr, NOT!!!

As for me not being good enough, well, I’m not the one suggesting someone has an affair or breaks another persons heart just for the sheer fun of it. What a plonker!

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21 thoughts on “Trading Places

  1. Although I havent experienced this (or maybe i just havent been told about it??) I have had to put up with men assuming I am single and available just because I keep my family life well away from work. When I go home I want to be me, I want my family (even if that is just a partner and a dog!) We both have to endure being separated due to work commitments, so really enjoy our family time together. I don’t keep a photo on my desk (or desktop in this cyber age!) I mentally shut off home and work life. Just because I dont talk about my partner makes people assume we are not getting on, or that im looking for something better. Some men assume that just because you are both booked into a same hotel with work you can share a room! AS IF! There is and always will be a lack of respect like this. No matter how hard you try jack the lad will always open his mouth and stir things up!

    • Yes, AGREED, completely agree!!!!! This is another annoying side of this. I don’t get it at all – WHY??? Why do women need to wear their relationship status on their sleeves for all to see, and men, can be a s ambiguous as the choose, and often are, even if Married or single. DOUBLE STANDARDS!!!!! Yeah, women have to talk constantly about ‘their men’ – show they are off the market and taken. Otherwise, they are available for any and every man – AS IF indeed!!!!! Women still get stared at if they eat alone, go into a bar alone or are in the cinema alone – men, no they are free to do whatever without being bombarded with hassle by horny women desperately trying to lure them into bed!! Women alone are assumed to be on the look out for SEX, this is absolutely ridiculous, and insulting!!!!

      • actually, experience has proven to me that if you actually take this ‘bull by his horns’ he quickly turns into a quivering jelly unable to string a sentance together – bravado is no match for a woman who stands up and says – come on then! lol

  2. Bex, I don’t blame you for being angry at those remarks. But I agree with everyone here. The colleague sounds unhappy and wants your boyfriend to be unhappy too. Misery loves company. Your boyfriend sounds like a great guy who’s lucky to have you.

  3. People who make comments like that are sorely unhappy themselves and just aim to be nasty. Not worth your energy to let his comment bother you further..what a jerk.

  4. It may not be funny, but just because someone was bullshitting around, doesn’t mean they’re a bad person. Stuff like that isn’t worth mentioning, and your bf would have done you a favour by not relaying that.

    • I don’t know this man who said these things, but for me it wasn’t a good first (relayed) impression. I suppose it hurt me as I wasn’t there to be even commented on, plus he doesn’t know me either! I know, I wish he hadn’t, but he just thought it was a laugh – as he doesn’t see such things as serious, but I did!!!!

  5. That’s nothing less of insulting. A joke? sure it waaaas… and I’m Joan of Arc reincarnated! I pity his wife/girlfriend. Thank God your boyfriend ignored him. (:

  6. There there.. The universe is full of disrespectful people, we just learn to consider them ghosts or something.. I’m surprised that your boyfriend took it as a joke though, I’m guessing the right reaction was supposed to be a punch in the face or something!

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