Home » Mental Health » Is There Anybody Out There………

Is There Anybody Out There………


I could scream, but I won’t

I’m having a bit of a bad day today. Not feeling my usual jubilant and positive self, maybe the lack of sleep is eventually taking its toll upon me, who knows.

Anyway, I have been feeling quite disheartened about writing. Racking my brains and pulling my hair out over this whole quest of mine to ‘write’. Its not just the The Publishing Ladder
that is bugging me, as I have GIVEN UP on that for the time being; I can’t juggle what I have going on at the moment anyway!!!! I feel guilty enough that I am pouring my time, and energy into researching and writing, thinking and feeling the work, only to neglect most other things; including sleep and practising Spanish.

I wish there were at least 3 of me so I could do all the things I need to. Yes I am becoming a Bundle Of Nerves

Though, I try not to over think things and defeat myself, I do; it is just too easy a conquest.

Consequently today I am unenthusiastic, and to be honest angry. This has been building in me for a while. I have to say, or write, that I am fed up of being ignored, giving my best in things and being kicked to the curb (to reuse and over used Americanism). I am sick of feeling like a ‘poor relation’ over looked and under estimated.

I have raised questions that some don’t wish to answer, and that is fine, but I thought opinions were up for general discussion?? Or why else raise them?? Is merely concurring with one view the way it has to be?? I appreciate many views, but many people don’t seem to appreciate that way of being! What’s the golden handshake then? What am I missing???

Please enlighten me people before I truly do go crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!

That is of course assuming anyone will ever read or comment on this drop in the ocean post of mine.

The end!

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24 thoughts on “Is There Anybody Out There………

  1. Breathe deeply! You are doing a great job! It takes quite something for people to comment on posts, I realized. I am managing a blog for work as well, where different people from the institute blog about their research, and we only had a few comments on 1 of the 15 posts. But I can see that lots of people have read it in the statistics. I used to write on livejournal and got frustrated about people not commenting (when I could see they had visited my lj) and when I decided to friends-lock my journal for future story posts, suddenly more than 100 friends requests came in within 12 hours! They all wanted to keep reading… The internet is still a very anonymous thing and people are just lazy about commenting, it doesn’t say anything about your writing.:)

    • Hi,
      Thank you so much for that!!! Your considered and kind comment are very welcomed. I feel a bit more tranquil today though, and realise that I have a tendency to blow things out of perspective!
      This week I just couldn’t control my worry. I wanted some sort of feedback to ensure my writing wasn’t well off the mark, and began thinking something profound was wrong with my work as no-one seemed to be interacting.
      Anyway paranoia headed off, for now!
      I do agree with you it takes time, effort and I think patience too as people can be lazy! So I’ll just breathe, and chill!!!!
      Hope your blog is doing well too???
      Thanks again,
      Bex 🙂

      • Slowly but surely trying to get my head around the whole blogging experience, yes! Thanks for asking… 😉 Mostly trying to enjoy the writing things down so I don’t forget how they were thing! 😀 Have a great day! Mel

        • Hi Mel,
          Good I am glad! Yes, the writing part is a good record for you at the moment. I think its good to look back over old work as it does bring back the time and place it was written within vividly!
          You have a great day too, and take care.
          Bex 🙂

  2. Sorry to read that you’re having a frustrating start to the week but I hope that writing this post has helped in some way.

    If not, can I offer you some hugs of my own? 🙂

    I particularly enjoy reading and feel I can relate (obviously) to your posts on situations within the UK. Do you use Twitter? I find it’s a great way for sharing and promoting my blog by connecting it to WordPress for automatic updates. You can do the same with Facebook and others.

    • Hey, thanks for your comment and offer of hugs, much appreciated 🙂
      Yes, it helped to air my feelings, which was sorely needed. I feel more relaxed now, but still a little strung out. I think a good nights sleep would help!
      Thank you for that; I am happy you enjoy reading the UK related posts, that’s great to know.
      I do use Twitter, and it is linked to this blog, but to be honest I don’t really use it otherwise. Reason being is I can never seem to grasp how to promote myself with it. I seem stuck.
      Facebook, I am just doing a page to link to this site at the moment. I hope that by next week I’ll have it 100% sorted out. Again though, I worry about how to promote myself.
      My main concerns are finding the right avenues to promote and obviously not becoming a ‘spammer’.

      Any advice would be appreciatively received ?????

      Thanks again, hugs to you too 🙂

      • Thank you. 🙂

        I’m the same with Twitter. All I really do is try to find and follow people who might be interested in what I have to share. If someone follows me, I usually tweet them to say thank you. There’s often too much else going on for me to try and keep up – WordPress does the rest.

        I’ve used Facebook on another blog in the same way but, I haven’t yet tried it out for this one. Someone once suggested I try adding unique content to the Facebook page, so that people will follow both (or all).

        Hope it helps. 🙂

        How’s autumn/winter over there?

        • No problems!

          Yeah, that is it. It is too vast, and I’m always left feeling as though I’m chasing my tail with it. I think next week I might make it a ‘to do’, see if I can make more head way!

          Yeah, well that was what I was thinking. I can’t merely replicate what is on here. I have added a few posts to it, and also pics and quotes. Hoping next week the page will be up and running, all being well, and fingers crossed!!!!

          Thank you for your advice, I will put it to use. It is good to be able to talk to someone about that, as no-one I know does anything like this.

          Well, this morning I went shopping and for the first day walking about I could see my breath in the air. It is cold, but not unbearable. Looks like it could rain too, which is always needed here anyway!

          How is it over there? Freezing and raining?

          Take care,and thanks again!
          Bex 🙂

          • It’ll be good to see how it turns out and how well it works for you, Bex. 🙂

            Today’s been fairly mild, if very wet (more so than yesterday). Sunday began with widespread frost and ice but, the rest of this week’s forecast looks to be around the double-figure mark. 🙂

            You should’ve taken some of our rain with you when you moved… Seriously though, I don’t understand how we can have too much rain in some parts of the world but devastating droughts in others. With great ice bergs slowly deteriorating, you’d think there would be a solution that could benefit us all?

          • Thanks for that! I will maintain hope that it will work, but I’m not expecting much to be honest. Things often take the hard road for me, never the easy one! That is not pessimism, just accepting the reality with a little humour!!!!

            Wow, mild and double figures. What is happening to the UK weather, is it freaking out!!! Yeah, I thought I’d never miss it, but strangely I do, as it rains so infrequently here. Well who knows, I thought the UK would be a leading light in water storage. Yet in Madrid it is sunny for much of the year and they don’t use solar power. It would make sense here!

            Anyway, hope you are OK???

          • They’re now saying we’ve got more rain to come this week with flood warnings and all. I’m not sure when it’s supposed to get colder.

            I am surprised that they don’t utilise solar power over there. What do the Spanish know that we don’t? It seems rather daft that we do so much, when you think of all the cloud coverage the UK gets…

            Yeah, I’m okay thanks. Have some writing I need to do this evening for my class on Thursday and then I’ve got to return to work tomorrow, after two days off. 😦

            Have you adapted to drinking tap water in Spain?

          • Well, once the rain begins it doesn’t know when to finish it’s assault! Typical! I don’t think they do know more, I just don’t think it is such a big thing here. I will ask, as I am meeting a friend tomorrow for lunch.It is a waste of time in the UK, I don’t know why they bother, hehe!!
            Glad you are OK 🙂 Ah, OK, well that’s important, I hope your creativity is flowing?! Oh, bad news, never good returning to the dreaded work after time away in the real world. Just apply the ‘game face’ and smile! I know, its not easy 😦
            Yeah, no issues from the first. I think it’s only places like Ibiza there are issues (Island stuff). Here the water is good and clean, thank God!!!
            .

  3. Hello – i would say good morning but it appears neither of us is having that experience, unfortunately. Why don’t you just scream? Let it all out!! You might feel better. I am glad you at least wrote about this though, because if you are at all like me, writing is a great way to get things off your chest. I can really relate to your words as well! I, without being cocky or even overly confident, feel as though my writing is worthy of much more attention if not at least discussion and debate, comments, opinions and so forth and so on. I think I could be getting published somewhere, wherever that may be. But anyway, just know that you are not alone in this predicament. I am guilty of not commenting enough on your work, but I DO ENJOY YOUR WRITING!!! In fact, I am viewing your page right now while I am supposed to be in class – hopefully that says something!

    Anyway, enjoy a nice cup of coffee, yell some expletives maybe and carry on!

    Best!

    -Paul

    • Hello Paul, many thanks for your considered and gracious comment. I must say I read your words and smiled!!!!! I appreciate the support and positivity you are bestowing to me, thank you 🙂
      Yes I do see writing as therapeutic, I had to write this morn as I felt I would explode! I agree, I think we are on similar wave lengths here, spooky and yet fascinating; I feel those very frustrations acutely at the moment. It is good to know others feel as I do!! I just wish I heard more from people, as the silence is often overwhelming!! Wondering if I am moving in the right direction or labouring under false pretences!
      Anyway, I am trying to mellow out now. I have engaged in a political rant elsewhere, which has helped (the expletives and shouting included)!!!
      Oh, now I feel guilty for making you say you are ‘guilty’ of not commenting on my work. Though, it is great to know you read and enjoy my work!!! That means a lot 🙂 I too enjoy your work.
      Let me say too that I am happy, but also concerned you are reading my posts when you should be in class!
      I hope your morning didn’t blight the remainder of your day??
      All the best to you too,
      Bex

      • That’s awesome! As far as class goes…you could check out my recent post that might explain a few things. I have made skipping monday morning class a really bad 2 time habit sorta…shh dont tell!

        And, for what its worth, know I am always open to chatting, whether it be about protests or personal things, feel free to drop by or exchange emails or whatever!

        Best,

        -Paul

        • Hey Paul!

          OK, I won’t tell; your secret is safe with me!!

          You know I took a look and left a comment last night, well I think it was last night. It was an insightful post, very honest. I hope you read my comment soon, as I did ramble a bit, but I have asked some questions on the topic.

          Yes, that is good to hear. I appreciate that as it is great to have good people to chat to on here. Even blogging can feel lonely without good interaction. I would love to exchange emails. I maybe completely nuts, but is there a way of doing that without putting it on a post for the whole of WP to see? Oh, another thing I am working on is a Facebook page for my blog. I am hoping next week it will be up and running.

          Take care,

          Bex

          • Bex – I just made a quick reply but I think I will make a whole separate post outlining some of my experiences and also answering your questions.

            I don’t have an answer for you about how to swap emails without everyone noticing, but if you could send me the link to your Facebook page that would work too!

            Take care,

            -Paul

          • Hi Paul,
            OK, I will read your response, thanks! That would be good; it definitely would add an extra dimension to the post you have already composed. I’d certainly like to know more about your experiences with depression.
            OK, Facebook page is not 100% ready yet. I weird about revealing a half complete ‘product’. I will have it all sorted (I hope) by next week, so I will post out the link to you then (I hope this is OK)? I am struggling a bit this week, feel really exhausted, so not doing a good job of keeping up with things 😦

            Take care, Bex

          • No, don’t worry, but thanks for consideration. How I feel will pass, it is a lack of sleep issue!!!!

            Yeah, exactly so! I am keeping that in mind so I don’t get too obsessed with it all!

            Take care,

            Bex 🙂

          • Hey, I do too!! It’s the ‘banner’ pic I’m struggling with. Need to settle on something I am completely happy with.

            Take care,
            Bex 🙂

  4. first thing is that you should take long breathes and I think you’ve not enjoyed your weekend too. You’re right sometimes we cant handle things. Choose one field and then concentrate on it.

    • True, very true and thank you for you comment and input! I appreciate it. I have a tendency of trying to do too much at one time, and then being angry with myself when I don’t get the results I want straight away. I agree with you, one thing at a time and breathe!!! 🙂

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